Not long ago, I flew for the first time. I did so in a helicopter flown over the royal gorge by a former air force guy. Miraculously, I didn’t shriek, throw up or do anything otherwise embarrassing during our admittedly wild ride, though the last couple loop-de-loops made me a bit woozy. I feel compelled to say that I also got more than a bit nervous when we narrowly missed scraping a peak in the first few minutes.

Still, no hysterics, no air sickness bags, no need to change clothes, afterwards. All in all, not bad for someone who hates and fears heights, under normal circumstances.
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Yet more for[livejournal.com profile] 64weichi 

Fabric of a Relationship
Repacking her bags
she noticed a scrap,
the past in a piece of cloth.
She tucked in her pocket,
the remains of her passion.


Out of the Blue
He called me early
so I wouldn’t spend the night
upset over him.


More poetry for [livejournal.com profile] 64weichi 

The Kiln


Re-crafting from ash
a lifetime of art.
Pottery crushed in embers.

It’s Inevitable

I knew I would leave
even at our height
but I never knew how soon.
As I start anew I know
still not your fault.
Never was.

Falling to Grace

All but love lost
and when you wake
everything has changed.

A Poem

Aug. 1st, 2010 11:16 pm
For [livejournal.com profile] 64weichi , who requested poems on starting over and "things along those lines."

Late or Early

Long night winding down,
time to leave came long ago.
Sun still not rising.
So, on our way back from our trip, we picked up some new tea to try, from the Sunflower Market. We've made some, so I'm going to give you some reviews.

The Baby Tea Blend

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Honey Bush
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I should have known better than to go out with the sky looking like it did, all gray and skuzzy, threatening or promising a downpour at any minute. I don’t like driving in any weather, much less in a deluge, but I hadn’t eaten all day and I figured I might as well go get dinner before the storm hit.

I’m late a lot, I should mention.

The first grumble of thunder rolled down from the sky just as I pulled in to the parking lot. By the time I’d gotten what I needed and ran, the rain had started to come down like fucking meteors. I made the, perhaps unwise, decision to wait in my car until the clouds closed back up again, but the wind and the rain, together, just kept coming harder and I figured I’d sit there forever, if I didn’t hurry up and just go.

If deciding to hang out in my car while the little rainstorm around me worked itself to a tempest wasn’t the smartest thing I could’ve done, leaving at just that moment might just qualify for the title. The wipers on my piddly little Taurus could barely keep up with the violet onslaught and I’m surprised I didn’t wreak. I spent the whole time gripping the wheel like I thought it wanted to escape. Afraid that I would run headlong into someone equally blinded by the storm, I clung to the roadside, occasionally slipping my passenger-side wheels into the already-flooded gutters, sending up great gouts of rainwater.

I got home in one piece, if only just, and parked my car as the far end of the lot. I opened the door for maybe two seconds before I had to slam it closed, again. The rain had started coming down, if anything, harder than before. The lot had flooded just enough that I dreaded walking through it so I again decided to wait it out and see if conditions improved.

I didn’t hear the tornado sirens right away, in part because they don’t have the same rising and falling cadence as the ones I’m used to at home. In fact, they sounded a lot like the howling wind that accompanied this storm. When my nerve-wracked brain finally put two and two together, I leapt out the car so fast I’m surprised I didn’t sprain something. Soaked to the knee, I ran to the nearest building, until the sirens stopped blaring.

I needn’t have worried-the tornado would have hit another part of town, if indeed it had hit at all. I’m hearing now that no one actually spotted a funnel cloud. That’s comforting, certainly, if a great deal less exciting.
This's my favorite poem in, like, ever.  Here's the first stanza, my favorite:

"And death shall have no dominion.

Dead men naked they shall be one

With the man in the wind and the west moon;

When their bones are picked clean and the clean bones gone,

They shall have stars at elbow and foot;

Though they go mad they shall be sane,

Though they sink through the sea they shall rise again;

Though lovers be lost love shall not;

And death shall have no dominion."

 



I'm told he wrote it in the aftermath of WWI and that might be true, though I believe it's dated later than that, nearer to WWII.  It's beautiful, no matter what he wrote it for.  Gives me goosebumps.
I wish I had a camera. I saw an itty bitty bb bunny rabbit outside the dorms, today, and I absolutely lost my shit squeeing over it. Naturally, it fled back into the bushes the minute it saw me. So cute.
I'm feeling much better now than I did last night. Walking helps and the biofeedback crap I tried didn't hurt. I got some sleep, at least and I suppose at least I can talk about it, in a way I haven't always found possible.

I used to have such trouble verbalizing what I felt, what happened when I had incidents like that. I'd feel like someone had bombed my insides and left it to me to deal with the fallout, hence this post's title. It doesn't help that my mom still doesn't get it when I'm depressed or freaking out, since oft as not, there's no reason behind the episode, aside from my brain committing mutiny.

So, yay for improvements, no matter how small!


I'm going to go get more of the aforementioned sleep.
My mom makes this all the time, it's wonderful as a coffee cake for breakfast or as a desert. Just make sure you put your cake pan on a cookie sheet or something the like. For whatever reason, half the times we've made it, the topping overflows, ever so slightly and makes a mess in the oven. Usually, it doesn't do this, but cleaning burnt blueberries off the bottom of the oven leaves the cake out in the rain, by which I mean it sucks vast quantities of donkey dick, so.
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I can't remember why I ever, ever liked Bill Maher, even a little. He's an annoying douche.
The Batshit Tea Party had something going in town, today. I'd made plans to go and heckle with a few friends, maybe find someone with a camera phone to record the craziness. We didn't find out in time to stage a protest, but I'd have liked to mockity-mock them.

Unfortunately, I have three projects to finish by Monday, nothing to record with and no one else to go with. So, I didn't get to go. I might have made it, if I'd had some time to prepare, but I woke up late, like an hour before the "rally" started.

I think I'll walk down to the library book sale to sulk.
[info]simplelyric 's last poems for the [info]help_haiti auction.  Hope you've enjoyed.

Hair
Midnight black serpents
slink across her porcelain skin,
like streams in deep night.

Turning
Children born in flame
as golden spirits descend
gracing autumn’s old plain.

Waiting
Spring whispers to me
in winter’s thickest storms
of tulips and sun.

Arrival
Flowers beckon light,
call forth summer’s heat,
minute suns beaten from warmth.

Early Days
Play, pup in the field.
Run with me here in the light
before the sun flees.
Don't read this while eating, please.

I don't understand what the problem is with Subway men's rooms. When I worked at a Subway restaurant last summer, I sometimes had to clean the bathroom. Hell, sometimes I volunteered, since very few other people actually did anything but sit around waiting for someone to notice they'd vanished for 15 minutes whenever they got that particular chore. I've always felt that restaurants in particular needed clean bathrooms, so I always made an extra effort to make sure ours at least didn't reek.
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Yay!

Mar. 27th, 2010 12:30 am
I finally found last year's booklist while excavating my purse for keys.

Now you get to marvel at my amazingly poor taste in reading material. I mean, there's some good stuff on here, but, really, I waste so much time on mental junk food.

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I supplemented this with the first hundred or so pages from Undomestic Goddess, by Sophie Kinsella, which sucked so hard I kicked it out and into whatever godforsaken garage sale bin it may have landed in, absolutely everything on Creepypasta.com and various websites, articles and textbooks that I don't remember specifics about.

Imagine what I could do if I cut the junk food from my literary diet.
I found the manga for Death Note at the library yesterday, so I'm going to try it out.  I normally don't like anime or manga at all, just not my thing, but so far this one's pretty good.  Ryuk's illustration freaks me out, though.  Those eyes're going to haunt my dreams, tonight.  It doesn't help that there's one person I know who I'd like to think that I'd totally death note if I could.
I are propublished author, nao, I think. BRB, freaking the fuck out.


(First name's my real one-Gloria's a pen name, I think I've mentioned before-last name, not so much)
In news you don't give two hairy fucks about, I just lit a tea towel on fire. I used it to pick up a kettle I'd set on the stove and I smell something like roasting marshmallows. I set the kettle down and this towel has burst into flames on one side. I doused it before I could light anything else, myself included, thank God, but the kitchen still smells vaugley like burning sugar. I'm going to go drink my tea and try not to have a panic attack.
For the life of me, I can't find my booklist from last year.  I could try to reconstruct it, but that'll prove rather difficult, I'm afraid.  So, I'll keep searching, try to remember what I can and, in the meantime, have a book review:

Bonnie Ramthun's Earthquake Games.

I sometimes come across a book that's so horrid it makes me want to mail it to Rush Limbaugh just so he can suffer as I did, reading it.*  Earthquake Games falls into that category. 

The story had potential, until Ms. Ramthun butchered it.  I'm sorry to say that her atrocious writing style killed it.  On one page, near the end, a blur blurred into, one assumes, a blurrier blur.  She did this frequently, with other words, and if I had my copy with me, I'd post examples.  Every couple pages had an error like this and I frankly wanted slit my throat via papercut with its pages.  Her writing also flowed like the river Anhk-in other words, not at all.  The only reasons I pulled myself through her blocky prose were that I'd almost reached my hundreth book and it was December 29th.  The characters also seemed lacking, in some respect.  Possibly, they simply couldn't stand up to her poor writing.

Don't get this book.  I'm sorry I even bought it second hand, though I suppose it's my own fault for buying books at the library's two dollar per bag sale.  They're leftovers for a reason, I guess.


*Mind you, I'm not sending him this one, even as a joke.  Ramthun's politics come off as far more moderate than his, but I think he might find room in his lard-laden heart to enjoy this one, seeing as he's minus a brain.
I checked out the first Twilight book today, since a friend kept begging me to reread it and get a third opinion. It smells of wee. I'm not even kidding. A friend (not the one who badgered me to give Smeyer another chance) thinks someone decided to read it high and had an "incident." I think some fanbrat checked it out and tried to scent mark Edward. Either way, it's icky.
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